Wednesday, 20 April 2011

A silly survey

Next part of our Shogun adventures should be coming up later today tomorrow (sorry), but in the meantime let me ask you to spend a minute of your time to complete this quick, short, anonymous and completely nonsensical survey which has nothing to do with anything. Long story short, the results will be used to sabotage a particularly boring and utterly pointless English assignment. The more people complete it, the more impressive the sabotage, and the deeper my thanks.


  1. Don't you go long story short on me, I want the details. Will you write a report based on this? First I thought other students would answer to these questions, but then I actually looked at the questions. I hope I invented a suitably nonsensical purpose for the tomato... can I answer a second time? I want to test the character limit...

  2. Sabotaging the English language is practically my life goal, together with taking over the world (from tomatoes) and moving to Australia, so it's right up my alley! Heck, I have a whole blog dedicated to that singular task!

    Also, having just gone from a 3 hour Portal 2 bender, taking that survey feels particularly bizarre. I kept expecting to be gassed and taken away to some underground facility somewhere tobnfkhfhnfmghhh

  3. Yes, there will be a report. The assignment is to conduct a small survey and write a report in order to practice academic/research writing skills. Of course, going around asking people would give something close to reliable data, but gathering enough of it to be able to draw interesting conclusions would require much more time than can be reasonably spent on such low importance piece of homework (it's English, ffs!). Therefore, we chose a topic and a means of gathering data that is guaranteed to give meaningless results, and the report will be a preparation for a "results don't make sense -> write a ton BS anyway" scenario, at least as useful for a career in research. It's gonna be fun.

    So yes, you can answer a second time if you wish, also send the link to your friends, help your pet parrot complete the questionnaire, or increase the participant count in whatever other way you can come up with.

    Also: don't be concerned about Someone, he's in a better place now.

  4. Well, after tricking the thing to believe I didn't answer yet, I created a second set of answers. I hope these are useful for science, or for psychology.

    But really, the thing about the tomatoes is they're alcngnsw npqwfemp'^'

  5. That was truly enlightening, thanks. Although this message cutting business might discourage other commentators (purely hypothetical beings, of course) from ever participating.

    In fact, I'd like to make it perfectly clear: leaving comments on this blog only occasionally leads to loss of language comprehension, fine motor skills or consciousness.

  6. Oh, well, if THAT'S all, why not jump in?

    Actually been reading your posts since Someone had it linked on his blog, I'm just a quiet guy. Love what you're doing, but pics or it didn't happen, please!

    I particularly liked the question about world domination. You just KNOW that Granny Smith apples are hey who are youiaiosjdnkvhndf

  7. Occasionally leaving comments leads to loss of consciousness? Ok, I'll give it a try, just for the kicks!

    Philosophy assignements are also good opportunities to solve age old questions through surveys.

    Is justified true belief knowledge? Is a bale of hay still a bale of hay if you remove one straw?
    -> yes/no survey -> majority wins -> move on to video games.